A big change

Wow...it seems like there is a miracle inside me right now. The feeling is both surreal and scary. I just pray fervently that this miracle will continue to grow healthily and that angels will protect all of us. 

I think it is probably week 4 now. So Dear dr Fong is still monitoring my blood to ensure the hcg levels are growing normally. I pray it will too.... 

Fertility issues

After years of denial, yes I have fertility issues. I have mild endometriosis, and my canal is challenging. To be honest, years of growing up I never thought I would be plague by this issue. I had normal regular period, occasional cramps but not dying kind. 

I think it's a woman' natural progression that you need to use your womb, and if left untouch weird things happened. It's like a punishment for not using your womb for what is for. So there yesterday I went for my first IUI and that's where my gynae told me that its the most challenging IUI he had ever done. :(

This whole experience just sucks. I hate the eating...the monitoring..the injections ....the constant reminders when I am on the streets that I can't perform the most basic task of child birth.

All in all, I still put my faith in God. I believed he has a plan for me in 2013. With the new house on the way, I am sure he will bless me with the miracle file of God. All in good time ...I just have to be still and wait. 

Amen. 

That's all for now.

I am an impatient bitch

Hmm...why am i am in self-loath mode? No not depressed. But just that work is busy and pressurizing for the past 2 weeks and I feel there is a need for me to rant.

I know as I accumulate experience I should be teaching the younger generation- the supposed Gen Y. I keep telling myself that I need to let go, but the control freak in me can't. I am always amazed at why these gen Y find it so easy to say don't know and that itself washes them clean of any responsibility. Bullshit... Seriously....

Back in my days you suck it in and just friggin do it. Maybe I am lagging but I can't tolerate the constant spoon-feeding and constant mothering. I wish these kids can start to be more initiative and also get more eq.

Wait a min was I like that once? Hmm...I dunno. Well I earned my stripes working for so many years, so these kids jut have to learn. Think life at Loreal changed me, stripped me of my innocence and instill an impatient bitch.

Things I discover about myself ..... Hahaha

That's it for now...till next post.

Counting down to saying bye bye to woodlands... Boo....